So you've been waiting for the next part in A's Royal Wedding Commentary have you? Sure... I know you're just being pleasant, but here it is anyway!
Me: Okay... Are you ready to launch into the ladies' hats?
Him: ...I don't think I'll ever be ready for this.
Me: The question was more theoretical. You don't exactly have a choice...
Him: ...
Queen Elizabeth II (center) with Carole Middleton (left) and the Duchess of Cornwall (right).
Me: Here's our first group of eccentric hats. What do you think?
Him: Well, this is our most "normal" group I'd think.
Me: I'd agree, but between the bright yellow top hat that the Queen wears and the weird flipped up brim of the Duchess of Cornwall's hat...
Him: ...It's weird.
Me: That's what I was saying. I think Carole Middleton's hat is relatively normal.
Him: Her daughter's getting married and she doesn't have the excuse of a title to wear a Lady Gaga piece on her head.
Me: That explains it. But what about Camilla, the Duchess of Cornwall?
Him: What about her?
Me: Why isn't she wearing a totally all out hat?
Him: Hmm... well after the late Princess Diana, people don't exactly love her.
Me: True.
Queen Sofia, Prince Felipe, and Princess Letizia of Spain.
Him: And there's the Queen of Spain with her mini entourage!
Me: Nice way of putting it.
Him: Why thank you.
Me: ...
Him: So what do you think of the Queen and the Princess's hats?
Me: I actually like them. The Princess's hat especially. I think it's quite elegant looking in that dusty rose colour. It looks like something out of the '20s!
Him: Don't get too excited.
Me: Oh, I won't!
Him: That was sarcasm.
Me: Sure...
Him: Anyways... What do you think of the Queen's hat?
Me: I think it looks quite cute looking. I can't help but think "Aww...".
Him: I agree with that one. I wish I had a granny that wore hats like that!
Me: ...Not what I was going for...
Miriam Gonzalez Durantez
Him: Look! There's a flamengo on her head!
Me: And that had so much potential to be a nice looking hat...
Him: You mean "nicer".
Me: From what I can see at this angle, I love her dress with the sophisticated dots. The hat's colours are wonderful and bring a pop of colour to the outfit...
Him: But the shape...
Me: Exactly. The shape... It makes me sad.
Him: 'Nough said. Let's move on before you start crying.
Socialite Tara Palmer–Tomkinson and whoever it is behind her.
Him: That's not felt is it?
Me: Let's hope not.
Him: On the bright side, it looks really soft as a blanket. It just looks so blue... Even if I was colour blind I'd probably be able to see that blue from kilometers away.
Me: Who's that behind the very blue Tara?
Him: I don't know. I can't see with the bright blue in my eyes. It burns!
Me: Seriously. Who is that?
Him: Look her up online.
Me: I can't find her.
Him: Oh, she's probably not important enough.
Me: But she got invited to the wedding of the year.
Him: I don't think that's saying much. I got an invite.
Me: Good point.
Him: ...Hey!
Marina and Ben Fogle
Me: Here are the Fogles.
Him: The who?
Me: The Fogles.
Him: Who are?
Me: No clue. But...
Him: Let me guess– you like her hat?
Me: Not really. I think it sort of looks like a macaroon.
Him: Oh I see that... I'm hungry.
Me: Anyways. I wanted to talk about Ben Fogle's hair.
Him: What is up with his hair?
Me: My question exactly.
Him: It's poofy and only the top's blonde...
Me: I think you've found your new infatuation.
Queen Margrethe II of Denmark
Him: A bird molted on the Queen of Denmark's head.
Me: Molted?
Him: I'm serious. A bird molted on her head.
Me: I see that!
Him: A blue bird just dropped feathers on her head.
Me: Man... I do see that.
Him: I told you. A bird molted on the Queen of Denmark's head.
Me: Poor Queen Margrethe.
Him: Poor bird!
Princess Eugenie and Princess Beatrice of York.
Him: Wow... so this is the hat that has it's own facebook page!
Me: If you're talking about Princess Beatrice's hat, then yup. It has about 5 facebook pages all to it's self. Among them my favorite would have to be "Princess Beatrice's Ridiculous Hat Killed Osama Bin Laden".
Him: I think I already joined that one.
Me: And the sad thing is that the group "LOVE Princess Beatrice's Hat"has the fewest members.
Him: I don't blame them.
Me: As a work of art, Princess Beatrice's hat is just brill. But as a hat...
Him: It's the worst hat in the history of worst ugly hats.
Me: To put it bluntly.
Him: Her sister's seems a bit better.
Me: Princess Eugenie's hat seems a bit more... restrained.
Him: Good thing too. It's scary enough.
Me: Well in short, the princesses of York have outdone themselves.
Him: And that's to put it lightly.
Me: That concludes our segment on hats.
Him: We hope you enjoyed it as much as we've enjoyed making it.
Me: Remember you can always comment below and tell us what you liked so our next one will be even better!
